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Hampton Roads' Biggest "Born & Raised" Know-It-All!

The Downtowner Answerman

Dear Downtowner Answerman,

My wife wants to be a witch on Halloween when we attend a popular costume party next month. I told her I think it’s a great idea because we could save the money for her costume because she is already a witch. She has taken my comment the wrong way and has now led for divorce. I am crushed. Even though she is indeed a witch, we had some really good times. We have been married for 75 years and I just don’t understand why she wants to end the marriage now. What should I do?
-- Baffled on Baldwin Avenue

Dear Baffled on Baldwin,

Although you are going through great pain and suffering, get yourself a Halloween clicker and click it loud. Your witch may be attracted to the sound and realize that she is making a huge mistake. After all those great years of marital bliss and both of you on the verge of becoming centenarians, I send Happy Halloween wishes and hope she will point her broom back in your direction very soon. Thanks for your note.

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